ohm

So yeah, I'm a geek. Yeah, I like a lot of the same stuff that I liked when I was 7 (Ghostbusters, Transformers, Star Wars). So what. Both my rooms are littered with movie posters, a literal army of action figures and esoteric knic-knacks I've found on eBay. Most guys my age have page 3 girls adorning their walls. I got Mr. Stay-Puft, Optimus Prime and a bunch of Sith Lords adorning mine. I don't know if this means something psychologically, whether I haven't really grown up yet or if I'm just going to turn into an antisocial subterranean troll. Maybe it means nothing. Maybe this is just my thing. Some people golf or have a plastic surgery obsession. I just like to collect action figures. So to all you people who think I'm weird or that I'm wasting my money, I say, SCREW YOU GUYS.... ....I DO WHAT I WANT.
I'm not the band hippie I used to be. I haven't wore a tie dyed shirt in years. Now I usually wear monochrome gap shirts or the occasional Illini apparel. I'm still all about the music, even if I don't get to thrash my violin or bass guitar anymore. If anything I'm more appreciative of the power of music, whether it comes from my iPod, Krannert Great Hall or that garage band down the street. I'm definately not the same person I was in high school. My general outlook is more bleak and my wisecracks are more seldom and more disturbing. High school was easy, then I get to college and it's a whole new ballgame that I'm not especially good at. I never really had to study and now I'm forced to learn to study so I can learn. Thank God I'm done in december. Everything about high school seems so distant. For better or for worse, I've moved on. I love my parents to death and I wish I could see them/go home more often, but compound trying to carve a life here and the pain it gives me when I have to say goodbye and I just don't get around to that brick house on Poplar street too much anymore. Today was a beautiful day. I enjoyed my classes today. It was probably the most beautiful day of the year. I ate lunch on the Union's back porch. People were protesting a hand gun raffle. I saw many people I knew, friends, casual acquaintences and it was just a good way to pass about 2 hours. Some Asians came up to me and asked me about spirituality. They were former Buddhists converted to Christianity. I'm a former Christian contemplating Buddhism. I had a beer after class on my porch. For the first time in a long time, I've felt completely at peace. For the first time in a while, I forgot how much I hate school, how insecure I feel about my body, how much I don't like who I am, how uncertain I am about the future. I may never fall in love or become a doctor or be a success. But today was the perfect day. I'd do anything to repeat it Phil Connors style.